Monday, 14 March 2016

Selective Love

I  have been extremely sad because all my favorite Bollywood couples are breaking up or filing for a divorce.. It's like I have been the third person in their relationship and suddenly they have not just abandoned each other but abandoned me from their lives as well. So, it's not just Miss Malini and her team who are devastated and shocked! 
 It's not just Bollywood couples but couples around you and me who too are breaking up. It's sad, isn't it? Most of them gave me and my friend s relationship goals kinda feel and seeing them part ways, breaks my broken heart.   
There is a scene in Dil Dhakadne Do that I really liked and it kind of explains why is everybody taking the dreaded path of separation. 
*Conversation between Aisha (name of Priyanka Chopra's character) and her mother*
Aisha: Mom, aapnein papa ko kabhi divorce kyun nai dia?
Aisha: (why did you never file for a divorce with dad)
Mom: kyunki vo asaan hai aur saath rehkar problem solve karna mushkil
Mom: (because that is an easier option and solving problems together is rather difficult)  
Don't you think it makes sense? Four years of a relationship, three days of argument and break-up! Why is this phenomena of breaking-up becoming so common these days? I thought a lot about it and  my mind traveled in various directions. After brain storming I came up with a few reasons and if I start explaining all of them in one particular post then you'll need hours to read it. So, I thought I'll start a series titled,  'Selective Love.' This way you won't get a chance to roll your eyes in surprise after looking at the length of the posts and also, I'll be able to fulfill my promise of being regular.
Selective Love because that is what it has become. 'Tu nahi, to koi aur sai, koi aur nai to koi aurr sai.' (if not you then somebody else and if not somebody else then somebody else). Dialogue courtesy- Tanu Weds Manu. I know I use a lot of Bollywood references but I cannot help it, I love the industry! Anyway, so, I use this dialogue every time my friends come to me with a broken heart. In fact, I used this line to convince myself after I broke up. So, you see we take the other person for granted because we know we got options. We know we will find someone else. I know sometimes there are legit reasons for breaking up and sometimes you got no option but what about  those relationships where people can fix things and don't? They don't because...
Well, to know why you'll have to wait because if I tell everything now then there won't be any point in starting a series.
Also, do let me know in the comment section below about your idea of love and do you think it has become rather selective?

Saturday, 12 March 2016

Reasons why I am single #part2

And I promised I will be back and I am! Here are some more reasons that define my single status! 

31 I am the kind of girl who will select a Jeep over a Rolls Royce. Like the kind of class a Jeep has is unmatchable. I have totally imagined myself walking out of a Jeep in a Valentino Gown matched with Sophia Webster heels. And when I tell guys about my idea they are like, you aren't human!

32 You see my taste is royal and expensive. And that has disturbed some guys and they told me I am materialistic. Well, boy I never asked you to pay the bills. Did I? No! And this reason annoys boys who think a girl should never pay on a date. 

33 I haven't met someone who inspires me. Like their are people who do but they are all celebrities and of course, my father inspires me but a guy hasn't been able to do that and hence, I am  single! 

34 I am in love with movie stars and fictional characters. And they raise expectations well, they have and nobody has been able to meet those expectations! 
35 I get bored easily. I am too spontaneous. And I haven't met someone who knows how to keep the spark ignited. 

36 I am an emotional fool and sometimes I have legit reasons to cry. And  you need to be strong enough to handle me. Gym boys, I am not talking about big biceps here!  
37 I think I am always RIGHT! According to stereotypes that's like a woman's 'janam sidh adhikaar.' And guys, I know you find that irritating but deal with it! WOMEN ARE ALWAYS RIGHT!

38  I don't use Snapchat. Like what if bae wants to see how I look when I wake up? I'll have to tell him that  I look the same because hey, I really, really, do! And if you feel I have flaws then you gotta blame my genes for that. All the good qualities are either God gifted or just happened by chance! 

39 It's very hard to impress me.  It's not that you gotta give me flowers or gifts but just impress me your confidence and  trust. And when I looked for trustworthy men, I found a signal that said, 'try your luck on Mars!'
 40 I know I mentioned I wanted a husband in the last post but hey an ambitious, inspiring and hardworking man is far more attractive. 

41 I lack patience. I don't think giving examples here would appropriate. 

42 I dream about this

and guess what? He doesn't exist. God said you find him even on Mars! 

 43 Guys find girls who smoke HOT. I don't smoke and that makes me undesirable too! 

44 I haven't found someone who like me wants to wear Tom Ford suits and give the world those power couple/ relationship goals kinda feel. 

45 I am single because I am awesome and awesome people deserve awesome people but God hasn't created anybody half as awesome as me. So, this means I will be 'forever single.'

46 Lastly,  I am single because I believe he will find me, love me and never let me go!

Hope you enjoyed the fifteen reasons I shared today.  do let me know which one's you liked the most and which one's you did not. 
DAMMNNNNN... I forgot to mention this
I am single because 'jo humme chaiyeusse humm nai chaiye aur jisse hum chaiyevo kisko chaiye?'

                                                       I told you I make weird faces!

Friday, 11 March 2016

Reasons why I am single #Part 1

 It almost baffles me that you're single.' 'Why are you single?Like how on earth is that even possible?'
Like all single girls I get to hear these lines all the time. Dude, I am single and it's possible and I have been living with it and sometimes being single also makes me happy. But anyhow, I recently gave it a thought.  'Why am I single?' And I came up with a few reasons not few but many. So, I thought I'd share them with you . Honestly, I have been getting a lot of flake from some people that my posts are too long and this one in particular made me my eyes roll because the reasons were too many. Therefore, I decided to divide the post into two halves. You'll get to read the second half super soon and  also, it'll help me keep my promise of being regular. Does that make me clever? No, I am just saving your time. So, before I turn a blog post into a history book, I'll move ahead with the reasons . 
1  I HATE BEER. I know most of you might not even read this further but trust me, I don't like beer. In fact, I consume alcohol probably four-five times a *year*. 
2 I am abnormal. Like I really am. I wake up when people sleep. I wake up at 4:00 a.m and it's 3:00 a.m on extremely abnormal days. It's like you're sending me a good night, have a nice day! And I'll be like Good morning, sleep well!
3 Trust me, people have lost interest in me because of reason number two. They think I should have been in the army. In fact, I blocked a guy because he said. 'Oh my God, you wake up so early? You are 'marriage material.' Marriage material at twenty is unacceptable!
4 I am single because I am not 'marriage material'. I can't make tea. Like I cannot. I swear. If you follow me on Instagram you'll know I can't even make green tea. My Maggi is either under cooked or over boiled. I have never made a perfect Maggi all my life. 
5 I did not want to stretch point four more( that rhymed). I am not the kind of girl an aunt would recommend to her sister's neighbour's son. Why?  Because no arrange marriage. Yash Chopra and Karan Johar are to be blamed. I don't have a bae now but I will(hope is everything). So, even if my aunt's neighbour's son is like PERFECT for me it's a NO! 
6 Taking the 'marriage material' point ahead again because I just need more and more reasons to make myself fit in the 'forever alone' gang.  I cannot even hold a glass properly. Like I cannot. Every time I handover a glass of water to my dad he teaches me how I should hold it. I won't mention how because I forgot. Like should we hold it from the bottom or top? Or maybe middle?! Umm.. I am almost twenty one and I cannot hold a glass properly.
7 I am looking for a 'house husband'. I mean if everything goes well then I  wouldn't mind if bae and me  become  the real life 'ki and ka'. 
8 I believe in old school romance. 
9 I have a set of rules. Some people call it the 'old school Indian set of rules'. And you've judged me in your head by now so, yeah!
10 I don't date. Dating is like a pendulum, there is no stability. 
11 No guarantee either
12 Dating guys like girls who like beer and I told you, I hate beer. 
13 I *cannot*  tolerate, baby, babujaanshona, darling, etc.. These words make me cringe.  They're as creepy as lizards. Like totally! Why can't you call me Prerna, that's so normal and sweet. Sometimes you can even call me a 'bitch' like I am kind of used to it. But if you baby, babu or jaan me then boy make sure you call your loved one's one last time because they'll miss you 'forever'. 
14 My mom just applied some weird smelling oil on my hair. She wants my long, curly and gorgeous tresses back! So, this again proves how I am not 'marriage material'. I swear I get weird stares from some aunties because of my short and almost red hair.
15 My hair length shows that I am a rebel. And you know what? I AM! What's on my mind has to be done. Like it has to be done. No matter what it takes. I'll fight with you but I'll get it done. 
16 I haven't met a guy a guy who can intimidate me. Like I need that kind of person. He needs to keep me on my toes because I fly too much and I need someone to calm me down. I need someone to be authoritative but in a good way.
17 But most of the guys I have met told me that they find me intimidating. Like ask my male friends or brothers about it and they'll laugh it off but just other guys in general. Guys you meet at events or through friends of friends. They find me intimidating for some reason and I am friend zoned by them.
18 In fact, I have been brozoned by guys. Can you believe that? I have been. We've stalked girls together. 
19 No I am not a lesbian but I am single. 
20  I send mushy good morning texts to my best friend. And Sonal, if you're reading this,  I LOVE YOU :")
21 Trust me, I am not bisexual either 
22 And I am not judging lesbians or bisexuals. I mean I have to specify this because we live in a society that is extremely virtually active and most of them think they are 'mini Arnab Goswami'. And if by chance Arnab Goswami is reading this then trust me, Sir there are times when India doesn't want to know anything. They just want some peace!
23 I LOVE, LIVE, BREATHE BOLLYWOOD. Instead of getting modernized we all have become so fucking westernized that we have forgotten to respect things that  are 'made in India.'  I mean how can you not like Bollywood? Like why does entertainment have to be realistic? The moment you step out of the theatre you are in a 'real' world. Bollywood is beautiful. It's colorful. And to me Bollwyood means Akshay Kumar. And I can write like separate posts on Bollywood and Akshay Kumar
24 I wouldn't mind having a lesbian encounter with Kareena Kapoor Khan. In my head she is bae. And honestly, I am straight. I said I wouldn't mind having a lesbian encounter but she never said that. You  get it, right?
25 I am very clumsy. Like seriously. The food is everywhere on the table, floor, on my clothes and if something is left then it reaches my mouth. 
26 I know I hate 'baby', 'shona' and etc. but I appreciate it when the my bae is feeding me. I mean it's kinda cute, isn't it? Also, it's a better way to save money. Like if I spill  most of the food then you gotta order more because why will I walk out of a restaurant if my stomach isn't full?
27 I can't drive. I am actually not allowed to drive. I have visual distortion. So, if we're going out on a dinner date then you gotta pick me up from home and drop me back. What? I won't take the metro back home at 11. 
28 Reason number twenty seven also makes me an expensive girl because we will have to have a driver for me. Though I will pay for him but driver's do charge a lot. 
29 I am tall. Almost 5'7 without shoes. And you know  what? I love heels. Tall heels. Six inches tall. And it's so hard to find a tall guy these days. Like where are you tall boys? And he has to have a beard. I mean even Tiger Shroff has some hair on his face now. 
*I judge people so much* But honestly, Tiger, you are  kinda hot and let's not talk about how well you dance! 
30 I am not an engineer. Yes, I just said that!
And this brings us to the end of the first part. Did you relate to any of these? If yes, then comment below and let me know which one's and we'll cry happily over them.

                                      Maybe I am single because I make weird faces!

Wednesday, 9 March 2016

Different faces, the same hearts.

10 am: I enter the seminar room in college and I see shocked faces because the girl typing this post right here isn't someone you will see in college that often. I smiled as I spotted few of my classmates sitting somewhere in the middle. Well, who will sit in the last row when college decides to screen 'The Danish Girl'. Before I could find a place to sit, I hear a whole lot of North-Eastern girls screaming- Prernaaaaaaaa! I look back and say hello to all of them. 
Sylvia: This is for you.
Me: What is it?
Sylvia: See it yourself. 
The moment I opened the white packet I had tears in my eyes. It was a pair of 'almost bangle like silver hoops' If you've read this post then you'll know what I am talking about. Though mine were golden but the silver one's given by her are precious and beautiful.
I was speechless, touched and was going through a lot of emotions at that particular moment. I don't remember the last time I was so overwhelmed. 
10:30: The movie has begun and I am least interested in it. I am still thinking about the sweet gesture. Suddenly I start thinking about all these girls. All these girls who come from North-east. We all know how beautiful they are. In fact, they've got the best skin EVER! It's tight, it's clear, and it glows like it's no body's business. And can we please take a moment to appreciate how well they dress? The fashion industry is going crazy over the print on print trend and I believe the girls from North -East were the inspiration behind it. They are in fact, one of those few girls in India who are 'fashionable' and 'stylish' at the same time.  Everything they wear looks incredible on them and they  embrace it so well. If I tried to copy them I would definitely have Anjali's moment( remember this scene from  kuch kuch hota hai

For some people they might be just another bunch of happy girls but for me they  are 'brave'. We all know  how unsafe Delhi is. We all have heard of different stories of how people from 'The Seven Sister States' are judged by some vacuous and empty-headed people of the society. Yet their parents send them to get education in the big bad world of Delhi. It takes guts to come and live in a place  you know might not treat you well. You know you have no option but to be brave. I don't think I would have ever been able to do that.
1 pm: Everybody is walking out while I wait for Sylvia to give her a hug and tell her how much I love her. 
Me: This is going to be my priced possession for life. Thank you so much. I love you :) 
Sylvia: Aww. I love you and I have been in love with your blogs lately. 
Me: Do come to college tomorrow I want  nice pictures with all of you for the blog. 
While others were busy watching the movie I was busy thinking about what all I can write about these beauties who make  me happy. Honestly, I ran out words. 
Every time I go to college I know it's Udangshree when I hear some say ''oo meri kareena''. Every time I see someone dressed to T, I know it's no one but Shelly. Every time I see Ungtharin I know I have to annoy her by  reminding  how she  resembles one of my Malaysian friend's. Every time I hear a voice in class I know it's Irene asking Ma'am a question. A North-eastern girl with curly hair? Well, that's Joshi for you. And every time I hear someone use cuss words with my name, I know it's Sylvia. Yes, she does that. She uses all of it. All those words you use while you drive, drink and get dumped! She uses all of it against me and ironically, I was the teacher! 
Here is a short note from my side to all the bold and beautiful girls and of course, to Sylvia. It's because of her that I have regained my 'the girl with almost bangle like hoops' status! 
                                                                 (that's the beautiful gang)
   '' You're beauty lies in your bravery. You might come from the land of Mary Kom but you are the real fighters for you fight outside the ring. Stay beautiful, stay strong, stay fashionable and lend me some clothes!''
                                                                  That's me and my girl. 
                                                 P.S. Sylvia, I recently lost a Cartier ring!

                                                       'the girl with almost bangle like silver hoops'

Monday, 7 March 2016

Men's Empowerment Day

Good evening incredible and gorgeous women!
''I was almost jolted when my mom asked me if I could speak a few lines at an event organized by an NGO on the  special occasion of  Women's Day.  I have this mentality that wherever I go I either need to be the best and if not then at least different. Different in a way that people should remember me all their lives and for all the good reasons, of course!
Last year on Women's day I wrote a blog post on Men's Empowerment Day. Yes you  heard that right! Women's Empowerment Day popped up in the results when I searched for Men's Empowerment Day on Google. Though we do have  an International Men's Day on November 19 but nobody really pays heed to it, do they? Well, I haven't seen any article in newspaper or on social media that celebrates Men's Day and there are times when I feel men need more help and empowerment than we do!
We've talked a lot about empowering women, we've conducted countless seminars, we've been part of innumerable protests but the result? Women are still getting raped every twenty -two minutes. Rapists do not ask women about  their education qualification. Do they? They don't even look at her clothes. They just look at the fact that she is a woman and 'I can rape her' or throw acid on her. And the list of heinous crimes against us is never ending.
A child should be taught from the very beginning that the only difference between 'pink' (women) and 'blue'(men) is biological but their value is the same. The little boy hates it when he sees his mother being bullied by his father but he does absorb the fact that yes, it is possible and someday he can do it too. On Rakshabandhan, children are taught how brothers must protect 'their' sisters.
''Beta, dhyan rakhna. Kuch khanna peena ho then make sure you serve yourself. We know he is your friend but time kharab hai''. ''Kaha milli isse? Phele kabhi sunna nai. Kaun hai ye? Zada ladko se baat matt kia karo. Tum chothi ho tumhe logo ki phehchaan nai hai.''
Heard these lines ? I have. And I am sure many of you have even used these. Every time your son goes out with a girl do you tell him to protect her? Do you ask him who is she and how does he know her? What does her father do? A lot of parents don't. There is one per cent chance that somebody will throw acid on your son or molest him but there are chances that something similar might happen to the girl he has gone out with. Do you teach him what should be done when something like this happens? But we do teach our daughters not to go out late at night.
''Arre, bhai vo Akaash ki ladai hogai hai Piyush k gang saath, chal uski help karnein chalte hai''. ''Beta, please parso ki tarh kisi se ladh k matt ana . ''Bhai, aaj meine kya peeta na Piyush aur usko dosto ko. Tereko hona chaiye tha. Mein na jaata na to Akash to hospital mein hota.''
Familiar with any one of these? I suppose you are.
''Yaar sunn jaldi neeche aaja meine abhi dekha ki do log meri neighbour ki beti ko chedh rahe the''. ''Beta, agar kabhi bhi aapko koi ladki dikhay iske saath galat ho raha ho to please uski jaake help karna. Vo  tumhari bhen nai to kya hua tum uski help to karr hi skti ho''. Dude, kaash tu vaha aaj hota. Tere bhai nein to award winning kaam kia. Aaj do ladke ek ladki ko chedh rahe the meine unko khub maara aur police bulai.''
Heard any of these? Umm.. I haven't!  I clearly haven't.
''Insaan bura nai hota uska kaam bura hota hai. Agar aap insaan k kaam aur usko alag alag kardo to vo bhi aapke aur mere tarh ache insaan bann jaate hai''. 
Akshay Kumar said this dialogue in the epic 'Singh is King'. And I totally stand by it. We are teaching our daughters to become stronger and smarter but are we teaching our sons to be more responsible towards them? I know  most of you sitting here belong to good families and I am sure never will we get to hear that some man  from your family did something so demonic that ruined a woman's life. But why did women like Priyanka Chopra, Michelle Obama, Kiran Bedi, Oprah Winfrey have to step up for an issue like Women's Empowerment when they were so empowered themselves? Because they wanted the world to be a better place for women. Did they succeed? I suppose not. At least in our country we still haven't as we women still stand at the periphery of a nation that only supports men.
And I am not saying empowering women has been of no use. It obviously has. Empowerment gave birth to Malala and made women like you and me rise beyond our expectations. But I think we've reached a point where the right as in the empowered and responsible men of our society should come together under one roof and celebrate Men's Empowerment Day. Empower men whose deadly deeds ruined so many lives. Empower men who made us feel that the nation we live in is not for women. Empower men feel women need to surrender. Empower men who see their future wives as home-makers and sex objects. Gender quality is the theme for International Women's Day 2016 and therefore, empower men who think daughters are a burden.
Thank you.''

How I wish I could express my views at the event which will take place today in the evening. They wanted me to speak in 'shudh Hindi' and I feel extremely shameful and unworthy because I am not very fluent with the language that makes me stand out among people from other parts of the world. Before concluding this post I would like to leave all the women out there with a quote that I always acknowledge-
''There is a special place in hell for women who do not help other women''
Madeleine Albright.
Happy Women's Day to all you women. You inspire me and I love you all!


Sunday, 6 March 2016

Pose. Click. Filter. Caption. 'SNAP'

Hey Fellas! 
Shocked to see me so often? Well, get used to it because if all goes well then 'the everyday diary' might just become an 'everyday diary'. You get it, right? I have been thinking of doing this for ages but I finally have the confidence to be literally 'regular'. Well, all thanks to so many of you who wrote me mails or messaged me on Instagram. 
So, talking of today's post which is about Snapchat. Here are some of the reasons why I don't understand the application and it's over 100 million daily users.
Reason Number One- I cannot understand the idea of a 'good morning selfie'
I mean why would you click pictures the moment you open your eyes?  It takes me half an hour to deal with the fact that I have to get up and participate in the real world. Also, are morning selfies one reason why so many people are breaking up?
Reason Number Two- What's on my mind should be on my plate and in my mouth and clearly not on my phone for the rest of the world to see.
What do I do  when the waiter says 'enjoy your food' and leaves it on the table? I 'immediately' grab the cutlery and begin eating. But what happens when I am with a 'snapchatter'?
Me: It smells delicious!
*grabs a piece of honey chili potato and  dips it in the dressing*
'Snapchatter': Nooooooooooo!  Dude, I have to click a picture for Snapchat! All thanks to your patience the color of mayo has a tinge of red.
Me: Dude, I am starving!
'Snapchatter': Even I am but I haven't got a nice click for Snapchat since morning. It will just take two minutes. Also, can you please move your hands, they're coming in the picture.
Why do you have to click a picture and make the other ravenous person who is waiting to hog on the Nachos, Potatoes and Ravioli like a caveman. The situation gets worse when you tell your caveman friend that the picture you tried to click for the seventh time was blur and you have to have to snap the picture because it will add a lot more to your 'Snapchat story'.
Like whaaat?
Reason Number three-  The expressionless game!
I sometimes wonder how does the same expression represent- 'wassup', 'bored', 'party mode on', 'movie date', 'fever', and 'haven't been able to potty since two days'. Like how? The only time the expressions change is when your 'snapchatter' crush tells you that you're looking cute today! That's when the Kim K inside you pops up and you give an expression of a 'contoured' face that clearly portrays- 'I am sexy and I know it'
Reason Number four- Click like it's 'literally' your last!
I understand we all belong to the 'selfie obsessed' generation but how do you have the patience to add a filter, write a caption and then SAVE IT! I can totally imagine people in an ICU asking the doctor to click a picture for them with a monochrome filter and a caption that says- 'probably my last snap. Will miss you all!'
Reason Number five- I do not dress up to be a part of your 'snap story'. 
There are times when your friends make you pose for a solo photo because they want to show their  fellow 'snapchatters' that they've got good looking friends. And if not then it's just another reason to build up the so called 'snap story'.
Clicks a selfie adds a filter and then writes the most overused caption- 'met this cutie after ages. Missed her'
Well, that's exactly what happens when I meet a friend in college after ages. Dude, you missed me? Were we that close?
Reason Number Six- Let's party together!
Well, these 'snapchatters' are envied by other 'snapchatters' because their social life is next level crazy. They almost make you feel as if you were there for the party as well!
Reason Number Seven - Well, I don't know how to describe this.
It was way back when I was in McLeodganj for a college trip. Me and my friends decided to dance. Well, I did not know that the news of me dancing to 'my name is lakhan' would spread like fire and my friends back home would know about it.
Delhi Friend: I like the way you dance. And must say great expressions! Between who is the girl next to you? She is hot!
Me: What? Where are you? Why can't I see you?
Delhi Friend: No, someone from your college added a video of you and your friends dancing to some Bollywood song on Snapchat.
Me: Umm. Okay. Bye!
And I have witnessed a few more incidents like these where 'snapchatters' would often upload my pictures on their story and my friends would know where I am. Do you know how scary it is? That person who just saw your 'snapchatter' friend's Snapchat  could be the person you've been ignoring for ages. Or somebody you promised to meet but couldn't because you weren't interested.
Well, I Know you do have options for making your snaps 'private'. I also know ninety nine per cent of the people who will be reading this will give me a lot of flake for ranting about Snapchat. And all those who will be doing so are the same people who ask me to join Snapchat every now and then but I won't. You either love Snapchat or you use it because of 'peer pressure'. I don't fall in any of these categories. Also, people are sometimes so busy replying to their snaps that they forget about the other person who is sitting right opposite to them waiting for  a conversation.
People have been judging me for all these years because I am not a 'snapchatter' and I just expressed why I judge you.
'Hisaab Barabar'
Now go click a picture of this post and send it to other 'snapchatters' and start bitching!

Because of this picture and my Instagram feed you  might call me a hypocrite but trust me,  I  like to start my day without letting the world know I am up, I like to enjoy dancing rather than clicking pictures and of course, I love to eat my food the way it is served-HOT!

Friday, 4 March 2016

All-Around Control Freak But My Heart Is In The Right Place!

If you're like me then I am sure every time somebody tells you that you don't need a man you would want to punch them in their face. Well, I do.  I am a fierce and independent woman but I do need a man. There are times when I question my single status and that is when I contact my 'male friends' because I believe they can help me solve this issue a lot better.  I have been asked out by some fairly good looking and smart guys but some how they never interest me. Sometimes some of my friends say that I am over-qualified for most of them *blushes*. And then there are times when they use the most dragged one liner- 'you'll find him when the time is right'. But a few days ago, two really good 'feminist male friends' used a line that usually girls use and I always disagree with it. 'You don't need a man because you are an independent woman'. According to me, thinking you don't need a man because you are an independent woman doesn't equal to feminism.  
I did not want to tell them how my bank balance can never affect my need for love. Even if I would have they would have used another dragged line- 'you have your friends and family. Isn't love from them enough?'. Well, I know I do and I am thankful because they make life bearable. But I also know that I am a romantic at heart. There are times when I have fought with people and have used cliched one liners like- 'a woman needs a man as much as a man needs a woman'. I am an ambitious and passionate personality myself. I advocate the fact that every woman must be financially independent and strong enough to support her family always. 
So, the other day  I was talking to a 'feminist male friend' and we were discussing how my independence equals to the fact that I  don't need a man.  And  I  somehow thought of a one liner that I am so proud of and  I think all women who feel that love and independence are two different things will relate to. 
''I know I am a hardworking and independent woman but my independence does not mean that I cannot depend on someone''. 
My friend did not have anything to say after this but he did mention that he agreed with me completely. So, all you ladies out there go use this line against people who mix your desire to be loved with your career and independence. Also, don't forget to quote me! 

'I am messy but I know how to balance things I can't live without. I have got my priorities  right and I know when I need to concentrate on love and when I need to focus on building a bank balance. There are wonderful days when I can manage them together. There are days when I don't need the money I earned or my man but myself. I am all- around control freak but my heart is in the right place.
 Who am I? An Independent woman who needs a man because she loves being in love!'  

Thursday, 3 March 2016

Your Memories Are My Guilty Pleasure

Off lately I have been travelling back in time. Travelling back to places I don't want to travel but situations take me back and I miss the love, the memories but not him . It's the early morning messages, it's the support and the motivation that take me back to 'us'. There are hardships in every one's life and I suffer from them as well. I know I might sound selfish but it's during these hardships that your thought crosses my mind the most. It's not that I don't have friends, I do. They are lovely and I love them because they were there when you left and they will be there when somebody else comes and leaves. You somehow always knew when I was sad and when I was my happiest best. And surprisingly you always knew the reasons that made me cry (yet to meet somebody like that). It's this connection that will always remain special. 
We both knew that our relationship will one day come to an end and it will be extremely hard for me. We knew you'd manage but I did not want you to manage and I wasn't ready to give up but we did because we had no option. It was ugly but like the love it was ours. The break-up and the heart-break made me a better person. I somehow found myself. And it's the love that still keeps me strong and will probably always. I can shamelessly say that I will always be fond of 'us'.
A few days ago, I was sitting alone at a cafe and could easily hear tears of a beautiful teenager who reminded me of us. She was telling her friend about her 'break up' and I could do nothing but relate. The  way she was telling her friend about the break-up took me back because it was just so similar. I started thinking about how 'us' became 'you' and 'me'  overnight. The girl in the cafe was cursing the guy who left her but one day she will smile thinking about memories that she created with the one she loved. She will smile tomorrow like I smile today while I think about memories we built together.  Memories that are the only connection I have with you. Memories that keep me strong. Memories that make me cry. Memories that make me miss our love and your perfume. Your memories that are now my guilty pleasure!